Which Revision Of Spencer’s Essay Best Uses A Formal Tone


The tone of an essay is a critical aspect of effective communication. A formal tone is often appropriate in academic and professional writing, as it conveys seriousness, respect, and a sense of authority. In this article, we will explore how to revise Spencer’s essay to best use a formal tone, ensuring that his writing aligns with the level of professionalism and respect that the situation demands.

Understanding Formal Tone

A formal tone is characterized by the following elements:

  1. Politeness: Use polite language and expressions, including courteous greetings and farewells, to maintain respect in your communication.
  2. Avoidance of Colloquialisms: Steer clear of colloquial language, slang, or informal expressions. Instead, use precise and refined vocabulary.
  3. Avoidance of Contractions: In formal writing, contractions like “can’t” and “won’t” should be avoided. Write out the full words, such as “cannot” and “will not.”
  4. Use of Academic and Professional Vocabulary: Incorporate specialized vocabulary and terminology relevant to the subject matter, demonstrating a high level of expertise.
  5. Avoidance of First-Person Pronouns: In formal writing, minimize the use of first-person pronouns like “I” and “we.” Instead, focus on the subject matter and avoid making the essay overly personal.

Revising Spencer’s Essay for Formality

Now, let’s examine how Spencer’s essay can be revised to best use a formal tone. Below are examples of revisions for various elements that contribute to formality:

  1. Original: “Hi there! So, I think the topic is really interesting, and I’m going to talk about it.”

    Revised: “Greetings. The topic under consideration is notably intriguing, and this essay shall delve into its various aspects.”

  2. Original: “You can’t deny that this study is pretty cool.”

    Revised: “It is undeniable that this study exhibits remarkable significance.”

  3. Original: “I believe that the evidence clearly shows the importance of this research.”

    Revised: “The evidence unequivocally establishes the profound significance of this research.”

  4. Original: “I found this to be pretty fascinating.”

    Revised: “This discovery proved to be profoundly captivating.”

  5. Original: “We all know that this is a hot topic right now.”

    Revised: “It is universally acknowledged that this topic currently commands considerable attention.”

  6. **Original: “I’ll conclude by saying that more research is needed.”

    Revised: “In conclusion, it is imperative to underscore the necessity for further research.”


Revising an essay to best use a formal tone involves careful attention to language, vocabulary, and expressions. By applying the principles of formality, including polite language, avoidance of colloquialisms, and the use of academic and professional vocabulary, Spencer can transform his essay into a more formal and authoritative piece of writing. A formal tone not only elevates the quality of the writing but also ensures that the message is conveyed with the respect and professionalism that the context demands.